Friday, March 21, 2014

Friendly Counsels for Domestics

I thought this interesting tidbit in Miss Beecher's Domestic Receipt book written for household staff. I could see potential conflict developing as I read down the list. All kinds of items came flooding in with regard to a historical I'm proposing soon. Perhaps, you'll find some interesting ideas to run with yourself, enjoy.

My friends, you fill a very important and respectable station. The duties committed to you by God are very apt to be considered of small account, but they are in deed most solemn and important.

On your faithfulness and kindness depends the com fort of a whole family, and on you often depends the character and happiness of a whole flock of children If you do your part faithfully in assisting the mother to carry forward her plans, she will be able to train them aright. If you fail to perform your part, she will be perplexed, discouraged, and disabled, and everything will" go wrong.
Every person finds troubles and trials in their lot, and Bo you must find them in yours. But trials are sent by God, not for evil, but for good, so that we, by patiently bearing them, and by striving to improve under them, may grow wiser and better, and thus more happy than we could be without them.

Whenever therefore, anything vexes, or troubles you, comfort yourselves by thinking that it is designed for your good, and reap at least one benefit, by bearing i with patience and cheerfulness.

In all your dealings with those who employ you, try to follow "the golden rule" and do by them as you will wish to have others do by you, when you are the mistress of a family, and hire others to help you.

Do you find that many things are uncomfortable and unpleasant in your present lot? Remember that you never can find a place in this world where everything will be just as you want it, and that it is a bad thing for you, as well as for your employers, to keep roving about from one place to another. Stay where you are, and try to make those things that trouble you more tolerable, by enduring them with patience. Do not fret and be angry at your employers when they oppose your wishes, but wait until you feel in better humor, and then tell them what troubles you, and what you wish they would alter, and in a kind and respectful way, and you will be ten times more likely to gain what you desire.

Do you think that you are found fault with too much, and that your employer is so hard to please that you wish to change for another? Perhaps you do not know how often you do things different from what she wishes, when she does not complain. Perhaps she tells you only just what she thinks she ought to do, for your good. Perhaps she does not know that she does find fault a great deal, or that her manner is an unpleasant one. Perhaps she has a great many cares and troubles that you know not of, which try her nerves, and make her feel very irritable, and thus speak hastily when she does not intend it.

Be patient with her failings, if you think you see any, just as you wish to have her bear with your faults, when they trouble her. If you find your patience failing, it may be well in some cases, to say to your employer, that you should do better, if she would find fault less, and praise you more when you do well But never say anything of this kind when you are angry yourself, or when you see that she is displeased.

Be careful, in all your dealings with children, always to speak the truth, and, never let them hear from you any filthy or wicked language. Never promise to do a thing and then break your word, for this teaches them to break promises. Never tell them frightful stories, or try to make them mind you by saying what is not true. Never help them conceal what they have done that is wrong, but try to persuade them to confess their faults.

Never take the least thing that does not belong to you, and never tempt children to give you what does not belong to them.
Never tell tales out of the family, nor tell to your em ployers the bad things you have seen, or heard in other families, for this is mean and ungenerous.

Do not spend your money for useless and expensive things, but learn to be economical and prudent, that you may be preparing to be a good housekeeper, wife, and mother, if ever you have a family of your own.

Do not form a habit of roaming about to see company, but be industrious in hours not employed for those who hire you, in mending and making your own clothes.

Take care and keep your person clean, and your hair and clothes in order, and have your chamber always neat and tidy.

Do not be rude and boisterous in manners, but always speak politely to all, especially to those who employ you.

Do not waste any of the provisions, or property of your employers, nor let it spoil by neglect, and never lend or give away anything belonging to the family without leave.

Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy.

Read your Bible daily, and try to obey its teachings.

Pray to God to forgive your past sins, and to help you keep all his commands, and li /e every day so that you will not be afraid to die.

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